Gender transition in the workplace: Vanessa's story
A workplace where you can be yourself is worth its weight in gold. That is why we are committed to a working environment where everyone feels accepted and supported, whatever your background or challenges. The story of Vanessa, sr. site manager environment / exploitation in our environment department, shows how openness, support and respect for personal choices contribute to a warm working atmosphere. She shares her experience of transitioning from male to female and how Mourik has always supported her in this.
The express train of change
Vanessa says: "I knew for myself for a long time that I wanted this change, but you also need the support and the right circumstances. It's a process where it's like a bucket slowly fills up, and at some point that one little drop is too much. That was the moment for me to really do something about it." Vanessa continues, "When I had tied the knot, it felt like a huge liberation. From then on, things couldn't go fast enough for me. But I also realised: the people around me need time to be with me. You can compare it to an express train passing several stations. In every station there are people who want to board, but you have to give them the chance to jump on that train."
Gender transition at work
Once the knot was tied at home, the next step was the work environment. Vanessa told this to her supervisor, who immediately expressed her support. Together they stepped up to the director, who also fully supported her decision. "That felt great," she says. "We even went together to a centre in Ghent to seek advice on how best to approach such a gender transition in the workplace."
"Then I first sent an email to all colleagues saying that I needed to get something off my chest," she explains. "This was followed by a message from our General Manager confirming that Mourik fully supports this. That didn't feel like a packet from my heart, but a whole tonne." The reactions were positive. "Some colleagues were surprised - logical, because you don't hear this every day - but everyone reacted understandingly. A few people had questions, but I had written in the email that they can always come to me. That is the important thing for me: openness. If you are open, people get the space to understand."
Vanessa's new name also took some getting used to for colleagues at first. "Many people still knew me by my old name, and it was still used occasionally. But in the meantime, that hardly happens anymore. And if someone does make a mistake, I think, 'What's in a name?'"
When you are open, people get the space to understand.
The mental aspect also plays a big role in such a transition. "You can compare it to a scale. Sometimes one thing dominates, then another. But at a certain point that balance becomes so disturbed that you start living in two different worlds - and that is simply no longer combinable." Those embarking on a gender transition therefore also go through a process with psychological support. But Vanessa also found support at a centre in the Netherlands. "I found a lot of support at a centre in the Netherlands, where I could talk to people in similar situations. That helped enormously."
For those struggling with similar feelings, she has a clear message: "Go in search of who you really are. Let go of everything for a while and let time do its work. And also talk to friends or family, but only when you are a bit further in the process yourself. First, you really need to stand firm in your own shoes."
Finally, the work context plays an important role. "What makes Mourik special for me is the open culture. Our jobs are not strictly demarcated and that makes it easy to talk to colleagues or managers. It doesn't matter what topic. You are heard, and that is worth its weight in gold."
